Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Like Mother, Like Daughter

All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That's his.
Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest, 1895

I know I'm not a mother, and I know I won't truly understand what
one is until I have my own child in my arms, looking up at me, like my dear sisters have all done. "The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new." ~Rajneesh
But I don't like saying I'm a nanny or an AuPair. I'm a pseudo-mommy. There's so much about motherhood I DO understand now. More than I even have spending time with my nieces. I understand the sacrifices my mother has made for me and my sisters and brothers and dad.

I also, am just like my mother. Like mother, Like Daughter....

But I notice i
n the things that drive me crazy about my mother. Now, these aren't things that I hate, they're are the endearing things that make me bonkers, but I would never have my mother stop doing them, because they are the things that make her my mother. And I do them with my girls. And They hate it as much as I do.
1-I sing good morning merry sunshine and other songs when they come down for breakfast.
2-I ask them
a lot of questions about their day until they say, why are you asking me so many questions (i know mom would laugh at this one, because I HATE this one)
3-I give advice when it's not asked for.

4-I have to be asked like 3 times before I remember to get a glass of milk
5-I drink half the gla
ss before I give it to the girls
6-I force the girls to hug after they've had an argument

There are so many little idiosyncrasies I do. The way I cut vegies, the way I prepare food, the way I put the dishes in the dishwasher, the way I do laundry. I am my mother. And how often do we hear people go, "AAH! I'm my Mother!" or "You're acting like your mother."
The funny thing is...If someone said that to me, I would smile.
What a compliment.

I have quite possibly, the greatest woman on the Earth as my mother. So while I pick up these "endearing" things from her that I do, There are some character traits I pray I learn from my mother.
--I hope to be completely unselfish like my mother. I know she claims she's selfish, but she's not. --I've never known my mother to do anything for herself other than buy gel pens. (she loves the sparkly ones) and even those are for Genealogy. She would argue that she does Genealogy for herself, but no. That is for her past ancestors, and her generations to come.
--I hope to have her hands, weathered, beaten, hard, and completely tender, full of love, full of life, and beautiful.

--I hope to be as happy as she is. Even when she is exhausted, she has such a cheery disposition.

--I hope to be caring and loving as she is. I
can't even count how many friends of mine and my siblings my mom has taken in as her own children, loved them, listened to them, fed them, done their laundry (seriously), and most of all, completely loved.

--I hope to be as fun as she is. She is fun. My so much fun. She loves to do fun things. And I have NEVER beat h
er in a snowball fight, even when i join forces with Russell.
--I hope I can be as supportive as she is. My mother has supported me in whatever endeavor I undertake. Doesn't matter if it's theater, band, film, soccer, figure skating, piano, trumpet, choir, dance, she is there along for the ride, cheering, crying, smiling, laughing, and of course screaming, "Go manda! Toot that horn." (Ok, there's nothing endearing about this last statement.)
--I hope to have as deep of a testimony, knowledge, love, and commitment to the Lord and his gospel as my mother. Her devotion to the scriptures, to her callings, to her visiting teaching, to her tithing, to her life in the Lord, is absolutely inspiring and one thing that has always kept me as strong as I am, with the testimony I have. She embodies Alma 56: 47-48

47.....yea, they had been taught by their mothers, that if they did not doubt, God would deliver them.
48-And they rehearsed unto me the word
s of their mothers, saying: we do not doubt our mothers knew it.

Not only has my mother been a great example to me, but she has also been an example to my sisters, who in turn have become great examples to me. Watching my sisters be mothers has been one of the biggest joys in my life.

I love how Jacki is so involved in her girls lives, supporting them in whatever they choose to do. Whether it's driving or watching them in Gym, Softball, or High School Musical, she is just so involved in what they do. She's is so proud of them.

I love how Kendra is so
loving and tender with her boys, adoring every little thing they do and say. It doesn't matter if it's Tristan talking about his school or Britain learning to say something new, she absolutely adores her boys.

I love how Sharla interacts with her girls, taking them to the zoo or sitting on their beds watching iCarly. It doesn't matter what she is doing with them, the love in her eyes sparkles with love when she's with her girls.

And Celena, this new mother has such a wonder and amazement in her eyes as she holds this new little baby boy. Her soft tender heart shows through in the pictures as she discovers what it is to be a mother.

I have seen all of these with my mother. Pride, love, adoration, amazement and wonder. And I know where we all learned these things. And how lucky our children are to have such a wonderful grandma.

"A mother is the truest friend we have, when trials heavy and sudden, fall upon us; when adversity takes the place of prosperity; when friends who rejoice with us in our sunshine desert us; when trouble thickens around us, still will she cling to us, and endeavor by her kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of darkness, and cause peace to return to our hearts." ~Washington Irving

All in all, I am quite possibly the luckiest person in the world to have the mother and sisters I have. I have the bestest friends in the whole world. They love me, and I love them. There isn't anything we wouldn't do for each other. And it's beyond comforting to know that if my mother isn't around, I have my sisters to care for me and advise me and love me and help me. So thank you to 4 of the greatest influences and best friends in my life, Jacki, Kendra, Sharla, and Celena.

My mother is that person who tells me to keep climbing when I can't anymore. When I sit down on that mountain because the climb is too steep or too rocky or just too hard, when I'm out of breath and tired and my feet ache, she hugs me, pulls me up, dusts me off, looks me squarely in the eyes and says,

"Sweet Angel girl, my little Manda, I love you. I know you can do this. I know it's hard, and I know you're tired, but get up. Put one foot in front of another, and keep climbing, because when you get to the top of that mountain, the view will be worth it. Smile, enjoy the view, then climb down that mountain. I will be there to hug you at the bottom and to help you get ready to climb the next one. Keep climbing, baby."
And without her, I would still be sitting at the bottom crying.

But until my mommy isn't around anymore, I am the luckiest girl in whole world to be the baby of the greatest woman to be living today. I have the greatest mother in the whole world. And my wish for you is that you do to. Thank you Mommy.


Kandyce said...

Awe, what a cute post! Moms are the greatest!

a.r. :) said...

Manda, love -- I've always said, good kids make good moms! Love you -- and thanks -- mom :)

MegyKaye said...

your blog makes me cry sometimes. i demand you stop this.

yeah im like my mommy sometimes too.