I was getting bored with my photography. I was getting bored, because everyone else was doing what I was doing. Even better. Plus, I knew I was one of those mediocre photographers who were allowed to have a digital camera who made their lack of talent come off looking a lot better than it should. I see my sisters' photography and I hang my head in shame, even on some occasions cry.
One of my problems was I never felt that I could accomplish what I wanted my pictures to look like. I couldn't show off the world how I saw it. I wanted to break through and show that part of the world that was dream like. That life really is a passing us by, that this moments are impressionable. Much how I imagine Monet and Van Gogh and Renoir and Seurat felt as they broke through with their painting. We live in an imperfect world and 20 megapixel, perfectly framed, focused and color-corrected photos don't really represent most of our lives.
Enter the Holga into my life.
The Holga takes pictures exactly what I see the world as. Dreamlike. Passing momments. Sometimes blurry. Sometimes weird. Sometimes Dark. Sometimes light. Most of the time: imperfect.
And finally. I found a form of photography where I didn't care. I don't sit and focus my settings and my aperture etc etc etc hoping i get the right picture and lose focusing on what's really happening. I barely look through the eye lens. I just point it at something, set it at my hip, set it above my head, etc, and just click the trigger. Boom. A picture was taken. And then...the anticipation. I get to wait for my film to be developed and delivered. And you know what? It's like waiting for Chrsitmas. Every time.
Analog Cameras, my holga, have come to save me from the world of being stuck in megapixels and jpegs and raw files. We're numbed to photography, you can't deny it. But my cheap, chunky, almost made all of plastic, camera has been put on this Earth to save me. It opens my eyes, helps me "see the light" so to speak. It spurs my vision and my inspiration. Seeing it fills me with joy. When I thought photography had disappeared forever from my life, it brought me sunshine in a cloudy day of my life. When life took away my perfect digital camera (which i haven't abandoned, because it still gets great shots that only are achieved with technology) and replaced it with my holga, it was like seeing beauty as i always imagined it.
Live dangerously - go analog.
And as this obsession with my holga came about, I have also been obsessed with other Analog cameras. And here are the two I am currrently saving up for:
The Fujifilm Instamax Mini 7s
A small polaroid type camera that takes small credit card size pictures.
I love it.
I want it.
Why? Because although it doesn't take the vintagey, dreamlikepictures of a holga or diana camera...It's a polaroid. Perfect for roadtrips, vacations, hanging out with friends. Want it. Must have it.
And the Lomo Fisheye lens camera.
Exactly what the name entails. A camera that uses 35 mm film to take fisheye lens pictures! Just a camera for lots of fun. I plan on getting this one as well!
Anyway. So this is my new addiction. And I love it.